Get a grip

How can it be that I time whizzes by a such speed that I am left sitting in amazement. I used to blog so much. I used to be on WordPress weekly to enjoy the posts of friends around the world or simply to share a moment that had made me smile.

2017 is here already… How? When did 2016 come and go so quickly, and without so much as a “hello there”.

New Year Resolution 1 – blog.

Get through the year and actually put my mind to it. Who even remembers that I used to blog? I barely do myself now.

Of course, being married and a terribly mature individual now (cough, cough) I shall have to think of new and wonderful thoughts to share.

Don’t hold your breath 😉

The Bearded Beauty

We’ve seen monsters from Finland, a transsexual from Israel, cabin crew from United Kingdom, pirates from Latvia and so much more over the years. The Eurovision Song Contest never fails to shock horrify entertain Europe with acts bringing something unique to the stage.

This year however, Europe will be missing out as Conchita Wurst, a.k.a. Miss Sausage (insert own joke here) failed to win the Austrian National Final.

I thought I had seen everything in Eurovision.

Conchita came in second place with what can only be described as an anthemic ballad (and rather a camp one at that). It sounds like a cross between ‘I Am What I Am’/’My Heart Will Go On’.

Her entry, ‘That’s What I Am’ is quite likeable. I like it. I downloaded it from iTunes. Yes – it’s true. You CAN buy it on iTunes. Here is her performance in the Austrian National Final 2012.

Conchita Wurst is a fictional character who was part of the Austrian TV show “Die Große Chance”. She achieved 6th place, even though she won the second semi-final.

Her real name is Tom Neuwirth and in 2007 performed as himself and made it to the final of Starmania. It was Nadine Beiler, who represented Austria in the 2011 Eurovision Song Contest who beat him.

Conchita has her own website too – take a look here.

Oddstuffmagazine have also blogged about her. You can read their post here.

More Eurovision Stuff from me below.

The Eurovision posts on jamieonline

Eurovision Semi Final 1

Prepares yourselves people.

The first semi final for the Eurovision will be on Tuesday 22nd May.

Here are the entries (in order) for the first semi final. Underneath the video I have said a little about each one. In bold are the ones I hope to qualify.

Montengro: 3/10 – Very Balkan. A little too odd for my liking.

Iceland: 9/10 – Great duet. Jonsi is back after performing for Iceland a couple of years ago.

Greece: 6/10 – Back with more of the same. It’s like Eurovision-colour-by-numbers.

Latvia: 7/10 – Awful song, but it’s catchy and she has something very endearing about her. It sticks in your head FORVER!

Albania: 1/10 – I HATE this. Ouch! But it seems to be popular with lots of fans and might do well in Baku.

Romania: 8/10 – Great party song. Romania will do well with this.

Switzerland: 7/10 – Rocky number from the Swiss. Shame that the vocals are a bit odd (strong accent).

Belgium: 2/10 – DULL as dishwater!

Finland: 6.5./10 – Singing in Swedish…. Topical. This number bounces along, but doesn’t take me anywhere.

Israel: 6/10 – Odd doesn’t start to explain this. It sounds like it comes straight from Eurovision 1975.

San Marino: 5/10 – This deranged singer ruins every concept of Facebook. She turns it into some stalking seedy site. So wrong.

Cyprus: 9/10 – I L-L-Love it……

Denmark: 8/10 – Again, Denmark hit it big. They’ll do well with this, although I have preferred their previous two entries much more.

Russia: 10/10 – THE ONE TO BEAT! I think these grannies are gonna win it BIG!

Hungary: 4/10 – 80s retro. Not my cup of my tea.

Austria: 5/10 – Woki mit deim popo ‘Wiggle those bums” – no words to explain it.

Moldova: 6.5/10 – Hot guy sings a swinging song.

Ireland: 10/10 – JEDWARD! I hated their song last year but LOVE them this time around.

Watch the songs and read my comments for Semi Final 2 here.

Sneaky Shifty Sick-days.

Ever faked it?

Sickness – not that other thing.

Faking that is a whole new ball game…

"Fit as a fiddle.... Get back to work!"

Have you ever faked sickness to get a day-off work?

Being an angel I have never done that (cross my heart and hope to die).

I read a great blog recently about skipping work due to ‘sickness’, by a WordPress friend that you can find on my Blogroll – thesinglecell). The blog was entitled ‘It Appears My Hypocrisy Knows No Bounds’. I had to read it. I loved it. Some of the best headings were:

  • I stayed away from Facebook on Sunday.
  • I walked slowly.
  • I stuck to the script.

Okay. Serious bit (kind of). Disclaimer. I am NOT recommending that people ever call in sick. This post is not an advice page of any kind. I do not advocate doing it. Don’t blame me if you get caught. Don’t quote me if you get away with it. This post is just for fun. Fun. Fun. Possibly a few chuckles. I am representing nobody. Keep my work out of this. I represent my ‘naughty side’. Hahaha.

A very funny poster that you should check out and download – All about ‘faking sickness’.

I’m now looking online to read up more. I’m actually stunned at how much there is on faking sickness. Stunned!

wikiHow has a list. It’s a massive list. It’s humourous. Don’t take it too seriously. Check it out here.

Aha. My ‘Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free’ card. Time to show that I look at both sides. This next site is all about ‘catching’ the fakers.

How to spot if your child is faking sickness. Haha – got you!

The Mysterious Mirror Prank

I love this video. Some pranks for TV are not that clever – but this one is great!

Twins are so lucky. They are able to get away with pranks like this.

Watch a clip from a German TV show where female twins stand opposite in a public bathroom. Between them is the ‘mirror’, actually a pane of clear glass… But the public don’t know that. Watch and enjoy!

I hope it puts a smile on your face. 🙂

Preparation and organisation for trips and holidays: Good tips.

If you travel frequently you have most likely experienced a trip or holiday where something vital has been left at home.  I know that it has happened to me on numerous occasions. If however, you are not an experienced traveller then you may worry about what to pack. There is nothing worse than unpacking in your hotel and discovering that you’ve left the mobile phone charger, underwear or belt at home. It can be the little things that wind you up the most.

Knowing what to take on a trip, holiday or ‘world tour’ (you never know) is a tricky business especially when there are such strict rules about your luggage (when it comes to air travel). From my experience of travelling and enjoying holidays over the last couple of years I would recommend that you compile a list to use for each and every time you travel. Here are some simple tips:

  • Make a list of the things that you need on your typical trips. It takes some forward thinking. The best time to prepare your list is not before you next travel, but when you return from your next trip or holiday. When you arrive home you are more likely to make the correct judgment on exactly what you needed (people often over-pack and later regret it). You can check what was used and discard what was not. Once you have your list though, it is ready for all future trips.
  • Organise your list into categories. I decided on these for my checklist: essential travel documents, hygiene, clothes, first aid and miscellaneous.
  • Create separate lists for different types of trip away. Perhaps you’d have the following (it all depends on your hobbies and lifestyle): city-trip, summer break, winter break, action/adventure/camping.

I surprised myself when I came back from a 2 week holiday. I looked in my bag and realised that there were so many things which I’d thought were essential and in actual fact had not been any use at all. This spurred me on to make a list. This summer I went on a 4 week travel around Europe. The list for my camping trip was a life-saver. Not only did we prepare everything before going, but we managed to keep track and ensure that we brought everything back with us too.

If you have any other travel tips and advice then it would be great to hear.

Who says that happiness can’t be bought? I found just the place.

Just been shopping......for my happy pills.

I just loved the name of the shop.

OK….. I look cold and maybe I am faking ‘happiness’ a little too much for the photo but I hope you get the idea. It’s a pretty cool looking shop. It’s in Barcelona (just in case you’re wondering). Apparently, and according to the window [see picture] there are ‘Happy Pills’ stores all over the place. That’s a lot of happy people worldwide!