January: Drama. Blues. Booze.

I thought it would be a good idea to summarise my months throughout 2012. It is set to be a cracker of a year (a great year, to all my non-English readers, or should I say readers from outside of northern England).

January started most dramatically. Bas, my husband-to-be (I love saying that), and I travelled back to The Netherlands after enjoying Christmas in the UK. The drive from England to the Channel Tunnel was horrendous. When I say horrendous I mean utterly vile. Scary. At-my-wits-end-scary. I thought my life would end at some point on that journey. The rain was torrential and never-ending. Once through the Channel Tunnel (and after a welcome 30-minute break on the train), we continued our hell-raising journey into France where the bloody rain continued. How could so much water fall from the sky? Belgium proved to be no better – The rain poured from the sky and our car barely managed to stay on the road. Driving through a swimming pool is never recommended and as the car shook, swerved and vibrated its way along, the thought went through my head on more than one occasion that skis may have been a better option than wheels. I lived to tell the tale though, so all’s well that ends well.

It was so much worse than this...

January also brings with it the worst time of year, the post-Christmas-blues. Apartments and houses look so bland and bare without the joyful Christmas decorations. Is it just me, or am I the only one who never ceases to be shocked at how bare a home can look without the decorations hanging? It never seems that bare in November…

I was back at work, greeted by a class full of happy little three-year olds all eager to see their friends again – and their teacher, of course. One little boy saw me on the first morning back and said my name with such enthusiasm. It was as though he’d not seen me for months, years – or as though he thought he may never have seen me again…. Bless.

In order to brighten the mood, we had friends over for a games evening. I love games. Bas does not. Therefore, we played games. And Bas loved them. I won’t hear a word against them. That is the basis of our relationship. I am right. We played some great games – word games where one team had to name 10 things related to a category. The highlight of the night being when my team was asked to name 10 deserts… We looked puzzled and skipped the category. I don’t know deserts other than Gobi, Sahara… I’m struggling. We asked to hear the answers – clearly out of interest. Answer #1: Pavlova. I have to hold my hand up and admit that after a few glasses of wine I sat and pondered where this Pavlova desert may be. Possible Eastern Europe…? The penny did not take long to drop. DESSERTS! My wonderful other-half avoided reading the next answer – trifle. We would have been laughing into the early hours. I love games.

A fab game. You must play it.

Throughout the rest of January, we visited family in The Netherlands, caught up with friends, helped our wonderful friend-and-bride-to-be choose her wedding dress. Yay! We had a decorator in to plaster the kitchen (our kitchen shall be finished this year – finally); we watched Carnage and The Iron Lady (Streep must win Best Actress at the Oscars) at the cinema; and we had meals out. Good fun all round.

Oh, but then there was the party Sunday. The Sunday we shall not forget. It started with a neighbourhood borrel (drinks and nibbles) at the pub along the street from our apartment. All our Dutch neighbours were there – although we didn’t recognise a soul. Normally I know one or two – but the absence of everyone from our actual street made the stress-levels rise. I was using all my Dutch skills. Speak Dutch and survive. I survived – almost. We were labelled on entry with a post-it note from the very official looking ‘organiser’, power-dressed in red. After spelling my name repeatedly (in Dutch), I changed from Jamey to Jami to Jame where I finally gave in. I’d be Jame for the evening – for the quiet life. Jamie isn’t difficult to spell. What panicked me next was seeing the organisers hand out coloured flower stickers. There was a game to be played. Panic stations. I know, I know – I like games. But not in Dutch and not when I know that my Dutch partner is clearly not going to be in my team. We ended up separated. I must not panic. I must keep calm. Drink. Hours later, and after meeting some lovely neighbours we made our way, on bikes, to another party. You can see where this is going. We drank. We chatted. We drank and had a fantastic evening – until home time. That was when the wall of reality hit. Cycling home was an experience.

Oh – and January officially became my busiest month for hits on WordPress. Thanks guys!

What a month. January – you have been memorable.

Bring it on February!

Another scary photo

It’s only a couple of days since I posted a scary picture. Here’s another chiller. If you haven’t seen the last then this is worse, so much worse. You’ll never visit Grandma’s house again.

You’ve been warned.

Look at the picture. Just keep looking closely and then you’ll see something you weren’t counting on.

Not one for the kids. That’s unless you never want them to sleep again.

Did you just look over your shoulder?

Here’s the other one – just in case you’re hardcore and love being scared.

Will Scotland leave the UK?

Tensions between Scotland and London have been hotting up over recent months. The question about whether Scotland should split from the rest of the United Kingdom is not a new one. It’s also not a question which can go unanswered for much longer.

Personally, I think it’s a good thing that the question of independence be put to the people who will be affected. I would however prefer for Scotland to remain as part of the UK. I don’t see many benefits for an independent Scotland or a smaller UK within Europe with the current economic troubles.

I saw this referendum voting slip. Of course, it’s just for fun, but I do like it.

On a serious note, there have been strong debates over what the question will be. Will it be a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to independence or will there be a compromise; a semi-independence. I hope not. I think it should be ‘in’ or ‘out’. Too much hangs on it.

What will happen to the rest of the United Kingdom without Scotland? Will it still be called the UK? Some say yes, some say it cannot. What will happen to the Union Flag? The blue (from the St Andrew’s flag) will disappear…

Will Scotland enter the Euro? Will Wales and Northern Ireland also seek independence?

Countries dividing is nothing new in Europe. It wasn’t that long since Yugoslavia split into other countries (Croatia, Slovenia, Serbia, Bosnia-Herzegovina, etc) and that Czechoslovakia split into Czech Republic and Slovakia. It just feels weird that this time it could be my own country, the UK, splitting up.

The future of the UK looks set to be interesting over the next couple of years.

What do you think should and could happen?

Courtroom Blunders

These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

 

I find it really hard to believe that some of these comments actually came out of people’s mouthes. Crazy! I wish I’d been there to hear them.

 

 ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
____________________________________________ 

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s twenty, much like your IQ.
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
_________________________________________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
__________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
_________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The auto psy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________

And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law.

My List for 2011: And how it went…

2011 promised to be a year of exciting events. I made this list at the end of 2010 and worked my way through them as times marched on. I wanted to save the memory so have cut it from my headings and popped it into a post.

New things need to arrive on my blog.

Total achieved for 2011: 14/35 (43%).

1. Propose to my boyfriend. OK, this wasn’t on my blog list before I did it. It was in the list inside my head (but I couldn’t add it here until I’d done it – secrets and all). #1 on best things I have ever done.
2. Visit Kuala Lumpur and Singapore. April ’11 – Fantastic times. Kuala Lumpur was a great city. The Patronas Towers - wow! Singapore is outstanding. I could live there! On top of those two destinations, we also made it to Bali for 5 days. A great holiday. Read my post about Malasia here and my post about Bali here.
3. Travel to at least one European country that I have not been to before. Visited Prague, the capital city of the Czech Republic in March. Great city! My first visit to the Česká republika was amazing. You can see what I discovered here.
4. Read all of the Harry Potter books again. 29/8/11: I have read 4/7 books. Loving it. Read about them in My 2011 Books tab.
5. Invent something.
6. Pay off one credit card. Done. Yippeee! July 6th and the deed is done. This feels great!
7. Learn a new skill. I should have said ‘start learning a new skill’. I’m learning how to play tennis and how to serve. I doubt Wimbledon 2012 is on the cards, but I’m surprisingly not as bad as I thought I would be.
8. Visit at least three museums in The Netherlands (I must be more cultured in this country while I live here). Suggested places via WordPress so far have been…. De Pont in Tilburg & Waternoodmuseum in Zeeland. Museum #1 in February ’11: Rijksmuseum (Amsterdam) – Went to see the ‘Dutch Masters’ exhibition. ‘Nice’ was the word of the day. I liked the works but I was not blown away. My favourite painting was one of Queen Beatrix of The Netherlands by Andy Warhol.
9. Go to the Eurovision Song Contest in Düsseldorf. It was an amazing experience. A spectacular production in Germany. The atmosphere inside the Arena with 35,000 people watching it LIVE will stay with me. What a party! The best Eurovision Final that I have seen LIVE. Congratulations to the winners, Azerbaijan.
10. Make the most of my blog. I really feel that my blog is established now. I have great WP buddies. I am reaching a worldside audience and now I am understanding what my preffered style of writing is. I do need to make more effect with reading other blogs. There is so much out there to read. Great stuff. My target for hits this year is gonna be double, at least. I’m stunned. So very pleased.
11. See my family in England more.
12. Try harder to speak more Dutch. Working with Dutch children during a two-week summer school. The Dutch is just flowing. I’m certainly more chatty with the Dutch in-laws. I can say I’m trying VERY hard now.
13. Go to a least one tennis tournament.
14. Start tennis lessons. I’ve started practising…. Lessons should begin in September (but they didn’t)… oh oh oh.
15. Have a huge house party and invite loads of my brilliant friends (this happened in January 2012) – better late than never.
16. Send a message in a bottle. Hmmm, I emptied a few bottles in 2011 but never managed to stay sober enough to fill one with a letter.
17. Send a message tied to an inflated balloon.
18. Post the replies (if any) on my blog.
19. Make a complete and utter fool of myself. Oh what to choose…? Fool #1 To end my two-week job at the Summer School, I danced and sang in front of a room of non-English speaking parents. The songs – simple. Lots of repetition and lyrics that I won’t repeat. Did I look a fool? Hell, yeah! Fool #2 was on my camping holiday in France. I can’t dive. I tried, but I can’t. Luckily only Bas (my beloved) saw me springing from the pedalo. Thankfully. I dare not upload the photos to Facebook or WordPress. The shame would be too much. Not a classic diver’s pose.
20. Attend a carnival.
21. Kiss the love of my life on the top of a world landmark. Two kisses and two landmarks. Lucky me. 1st landmark: The Singapore Flyer. 2nd landmark: on the roof bar of Marina Bay Sands, Singapore. Yay!!
22. Fart in a crowded place. Done. Silent but satisfying. This is a public blog, so no details necessary… But I hope the crowd at the Take That concert are all recovering well…
23. Research 10 more people to add to my family tree. I am shocked to have achieved this by 11th January 2011. The wonders of searching on Facebook for names and surnames that you know. The links are endless.
24. Get back into my art. Complete a picture that I am proud of.
25. Visit someone that I haven’t seen for over 5 years.
26. Finish redecorating the kitchen. We’ve been in this apartment for 3 years now. It is time to finish those jobs. (This has been started).
27. Dance in the rain. (Thanks to Melanie on WordPress).
28. Read a book that is considered a ‘classic’.
29. Enjoy a weekend away with Bas (and stay somewhere unusual).
30. Write a letter to Santa.
31. Sing karaoke. (Thanks Jim Chaney, I borrowed this one from your list).
32. Reach 10,000 visitors to my blog, One Life - before December 31st 2011. Wow, wow, wow…. I don’t know how it happened but I’ve reached my target. It’s 18th May 2011 and today I passed the 10,000 visitors total. Thank you visitors for stopping by and reading my blog.
33. Write a poem. I wrote some drunken limericks way back in Spring. I must type them and load them onto WP. Coming soon…
34. Start doing some exercise (sit-ups will be a good start). (Thanks to Tilly Bud – for having a similar challenge on her blog). I am trying – I now have the ab machine, but still don’t have that wash-board stomach that I wished for…
35. Try 3 new recipes (I’ll let you know how I get on with them). Receipe #1: Biscuits – I made these with the children I was working with on Summer School (a two week course for children to learn English). I’ll have to blog about it. Watch this space.

One scary photo

Some images stay with you for a long time – and this one is no exception.

I saw this photo as it was passed around on Facebook. I had to ‘borrow’ it for my blog.

Take a look at the photo. It seems pretty normal – but – keep looking and when you spot it you’ll wish you hadn’t….

I got a chill when I noticed.

Don’t blame me when you’re freaked out!

Want more – Here’s another.

Jumbled Jittery January

2012…. How did that creep up on us all so quickly?

I am still recovering from the shock that Christmas arrived and went by in a flash. I’ve almost finished my Christmas chocolates. How many days has it been since that lovely day with the family? More to the point – How many days are there until next Christmas?

I’d better get my Christmas list ready…. (just kidding)

I’ve not been blogging very much recently. I have lots of excuses (all good ones). Here are a few:

• I am such a popular boy – I have to deal with my fans.
• I’ve been in England for two weeks and was unable to blog.
• I enjoyed Christmas with family and great friends.
• Work has been manic.
• I’ve been hit by the old ‘wordlessness’. Eeeeek.

But – Fear not! I am back and aim to keep you all entertained with fresh and funny little treasures over the next few months.

Keep you eyes peeled – I’ll be making you all smile soon.

J x

My Year of Films: The Reviews from 2011

Film Count (from 1.1.11 to 31.12.11): 51

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows: (Starring Robert Downey, Jr. and Jude Law)- My rating 8.5/10.

The sequel that had a LOT to live up to. Again, it was brilliantly written, but not quite as spectacular at the first film. Nevertheless, Downey and Law are BRILLIANT together! What a duo! Fantastic story and filmed in such a clever way. Great film to end 2011 with.

Real Steel: (Starring Hugh Jackman & Dakota Goyo)- My rating 9/10.

When I saw that this film included robots – and fighting robots at that I was not thrilled – but wow – I loved this film. it was one of the best films I’d seen all year. I can’t believe that I’m saying that. I thought the story about father-son was really nice. It seemed genuine and I got a little emotional watching it at the end. It really makes you want to cheer. Fab!

Kung Fu Panda 2: (Starring voices of Jack Black, Angelina Jolie, Dustin Hoffman, etc) - My rating 8/10.

Surprisingly entertaining. I really enjoyed it. I watched this whilst travelling by ferry to UK from Holland. A funny little cartoon – even though I’d not seen the first installment. Good-vs-evil. Light fun. Full of famous names too.

Tower Heist: (Starring Ben Stiller and Eddie Murphy- My rating 7/10.

Let’s rob a rich man! Nice idea. Funny story. Predictable – but funny. A light-hearted film to watch with a heartwarming theme that people would do anything for one another…

The Rum Diary: (Starring Johnny Depp) - My rating 5/10.

‘Paul Kemp (Johnny Depp) is an itinerant journalist who grows tired of New York and America under the Eisenhower administration and travels to Puerto Rico to write for The San Juan Star. Kemp begins the habit of drinking rum and becomes obsessed with a woman named Chenault’. That’s how it is described on Wikipedia. It was more of a drawn out drunken dream to me.

Texas Killing Fields: (Starring Sam Worthington & Jeffrey Dean Morgan) - My rating 6/10.

This was a surpise film that we were not expecting to watch. We went to the ‘Sneak Preview’ evening, where you don’t know what the film is. It was entertaining but rather bland. This film certainly doesn’t portray Texas as a state worth visiting. It all seemed so backwards. Scary open spaces - perfect for ‘doing-away’ with people. Eeeek! What makes it even more grim is that the film was based on true events…

Immortals in 3D: (Starring  Henry Cavill, Freida Pinto, and Mickey Rourke) - My rating 8/10.

What a blood bath! Grim grim grim. I have never seen so many people slaughtered. I liked the film. I am a real fan of all the Greek God films…. Fab! It’s the 60s remakes all over again. Henry Cavill – heeeelllo!

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1: (Starring Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson & Taylor Lautner) - My rating 7/10.

I went to see this and was entertained. The film was light. I don’t see quite how it has claimed the following that it has. The books must be brilliant. I haven’t read them I might add. Taylor Lautner got enough whoops from the eager crowd (I may have joined in with them – I can’t verify that, of course)… It’s a shame that Kristen Stewart always looks so miserable. It really winds me up. It’s your wedding – cheer up. Oh and it’s TEAM JACOB all the way!

In Time: (Starring Justin Timberlake & Amanda Seyfried) - My rating 9/10.

Films like this one don’t come around very often! Brilliant stuff! I loved the concept of ageing until 25 years and then the counter running out. The scene between Timberlake and his mum is heartbreaking. I was so sad. A great film with so many underlying messages for everybody. I wonder if this is the way that the future will turn out?

Killer Elite: (Starring Jason Statham, Clive Owen & Robert De Niro) - My rating 7/10.

Confusing and James Bond-ish. Too many cooks spoil the broth as some may say. It was a tad Over the Top! I am not sure that I can quite believe that a man tied to a chair can out-fight a man standing. Hmmm. Okay – it’s just a film but this was rather naff. It won’t be winning any Oscars sometime soon.

Abduction: (Starring Taylor Lautner, Lily Collins & Sigourney Weaver) - My rating 8/10.

Go Taylor! His first action movie and it was a pleasure to watch. Okay, okay his acting wasn’t brilliant but the sultry looks were always going to be a winner with me. Yum! The plot was pretty cool – I liked it. There was lots of drama – a good chase between good and bad. Clever stuff. A must see.

Margin Call: (Starring Kevin Spacey, Demi Moore, Paul Bettany & Jeremy Irons) - My rating 4/10.

The film takes place over a 24-hour period at a large investment bank and focuses on the financial crisis of 2007–2008. The film follows (very confusingly) the actions taken by a group of employees during the financial collapse. It’s a bore a minute. The film didn’t seem to follow the usual ingredients of a beginning-middle-end. It just ended and I wondered – oh – so that’s it. A big ‘nothingy’.

What’s Your Number?: (Starring Anna Faris and Chris Evans) - My rating 9/10.

Maybe I am just a hopeless romantic, but I LOVED this film. It made me smile and feel wonderful from beginning to end. It’s not Oscar-worthy in the slightest and it is from the Rom-Com mould. Films like this always make me feel great. I am due to be married – so why not feel all loved up more and more by watching films like this. I also HAVE to say – phwoar!!! – Chris Evans – hello… I wouldn’t mind him being my neighbour!!

Rango: (Starring the voices of Johnny Depp, Isla Fisher, Bill Nighy) - My rating 3/10.

Yawn. The clips that I saw in the cinema looked hillarious. Clearly the trailer showed all the best bits. This was a weird animation with an odd story that took way too long to get going…. When it was going – it didn’t seem to be going anywhere. What a let down! I was really looking forward to it.

The Three Musketeers in 3D: (Starring Logan Lerman, Milla Jovovich and Orlando Bloom)  – My rating 6.5/10.

It was okay. I was a little underimpressed with the film. I was expecting much much more and it failed to deliver. The millionth remake of the film was clever in it’s filming – I’ll give it that, but adding 3D effects do not make great films. I prefer ‘The Man in the Iron Mask’ film with DeCaprio from 1998.

Friends with Benefits: (Starring Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis) - My rating 9/10.

A complete rip-off of the film ‘No Strings Attached’, but still, this film rocks. It’s great fun. The comedy is fab! Timberlake is drop-dead gorgeous rather fab to watch. His body acting is fab. Of course, the plot is predictable from beginning to end. You know that you’re gonna leave the cinema feeling satisfied with a happy ending. Simple and fun.

Body Language: (Starring Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess) - My rating 1/10.

This wins the award for being the worst film of 2011. We walked out after about 20 minutes – I couldn’t bear to watch anymore of this Dutch-wannabe-Fame-remake film. Teen movie at it’s most cringeworthy. A group of Dutchies head to New York to take part in a dance-off. Hmmm – original. Not. Yawn! Bad acting and bad storyline.

One Day: (Starring Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess) - My rating 10/10.

Take your tissues if you go to see this. I’ve been reading the book and the book is brilliant! The story revolves around two people who meet in the late 80s at university. From then onwards their lives intertwine to the present day. Every 15th July we catch up with the story to see where they are in their lives. Realistic. Heartwarming. Shocking. This film will make you sit up and think. Make the most of your life. Live for the day and let the people you care about know that you care about them.

The Devil’s Double: (Starring Dominic Cooper, Philip Quast, Ludivine Sagnier and Raad Rawi) - My rating 8.5/10.

Dominic Cooper – wow - what fantastic acting. He plays both characters in the film and he does it brilliantly. You can tell straight away which character is which, and even though they look the same (as they’re doubles), he manages to pull it off so well. I’d only seen him in Mamma Mia, so was glad to see him trying something a little more serious. It’s amazing to think that this story is based on true events during the Gulf Wars of the nineties.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes: (Starring James Franco and Andy Serkis) - My rating 8/10.

I really enjoyed this film. I wasn’t expecting to like it – but I did. The prequel to the previous films – and it didn’t disappoint. I’m quite a fan of Franco, especially after the 127 hours film, back in the Spring time. The film touches some controversial topics – testing on monkeys – and is really quite sad. The things that science can do – scary!

Final Destination 5 (in 3D): (Starring Nicholas D’Agosto, Emma Bell, Miles Fisher, Arlen Escarpeta, David Koechner and Tony Todd ) – My rating 7/10.

I watched most of this film through my fingers! I was scared. Okay – I’m not a huge fan of horror or gore. This had plenty of gore – in 3D!!! Oh my goodness there was gore. It was VERY visual. The deaths were far more graphic than the previous FDs. If you don’t like needles or eye-lasers then AVOID this film at all costs. Why did I take myself along to watch it? I petrified myself! It was a good film, I’ll give it that – just not for me.

The Ghost (Also known as The Ghost Writer): (Starring Ewan McGregor, Pierce Brosnan, Kim Cattrall & Olivia Williams) – My rating 5.5/10.

The Americans just love conspiracy! They can’t seem to get enough of it. The film was okay. (I sound like a broken record with my endless disappointment with recent films). The accents from Brosnan and Cattrall were off-putting. Dreadful. Brosnan did not make a convincing British Prime Minister either….. Sorry, but I wasn’t buying into this story line. And…what was with the ending? I didn’t see it coming, but was it necessary. Watch it and agree with me… Note to self. Don’t agree to write a book for someone if this is the trouble that follows.

Red Riding Hood (Starring Amanda Seyfried) – My rating 6/10

Maybe I’ve been watching too many films recently… I don’t seem to be thrilled by many films. Okay, this film was reasonably good. Seyfried was good – a far cry from the jolly Mamma Mia role that she had. The film was dark, mysterious and also a bit ‘seen-it-all-before’. It looked like it was ‘Van Helsing’ crossed with ‘Season of the Witch’. It didn’t do particularly well in many reviews. It was described as ‘bland’ and ‘painfully clichéd’. I agree.

Super 8 (Starring Joel Courtney, Elle Fanning, and Kyle Chandler) – My rating 6/10

A Spielberg classic? Debatable. It had a little of the magic of E.T. Imagine E.T.-meets-Jurassic Park and this is what you get – A friend said that and I agree. The train crash is dramatic. Excellent stuff. I was really on the edge of my seat. There were loads of jumpy moments. Oh boy, did I jump. I just felt that it was all a bit of a let down. I thought that it was interesting to film it as a late 70s film. I think it might have backfired and made the film seem dated already…. Hmm.

World Invasion: Battle Los Angeles (Starring Aaron Eckhart & Michelle Rodriguez) - My rating 4/10.

Cliché. Shaky camera. Smokescreen. Did I mention cliché? It had all the promise and none of the delivery. The invasion was poorly explained. The graphics were shaky. I think Transformers being out in cinemas at the same time didn’t help. It doesn’t compare on digital quality. Too much of the same shooting and fighting from beginning to end. Too much white smoke making it impossible to see really what was happening. This film was a yawn fest!

The Inbetweeners (Starring Simon Bird, Joe Thomas, James Buckley and Blake Harrison) - My rating 7/10.

I’m a big fan of the TV series ‘The Inbetweeners’. It’s a UK series and very ‘close to the bone’. The film, like the TV series, focusses on four teenage boys who have just finished college. Now they aim to fly off on holiday, to Malaga, to have fun, drink and sex. It’s not quite that easy for them as they’re geeky, nerdy, simple and rather inexperienced. It’s one disaster after another with some rather gross scenes. The idea for the film was good, but it’s better in 30 minute TV parts rather than one long film.

The Adjustment Bureau (Starring Matt Damon & Emily Blunt) - My rating 6.5/10.

The film centres around New York Congressman David Norris who runs a promising but ultimately unsuccessful campaign for United States Senate. Life seems straightforward enough until the ‘men in suits’ start interfering. The film is all a bit of a muddle. The ‘adjustment’ people who are trying to stop Damon and Blunt from being together never explain their purpose. It all has something to do with destiny… By this point, I’d pretty much given up. Blunt is fantastic in the film, given the poor quality of the film. I liked her. I didn’t really like the film much. Rather forgettable.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (in 3D) (Starring Shia LaBeouf & Josh Duhamel) - My rating 6/10.

I can comment on all the wonderful visuals, the immense scenes and the drama…. But I’m going to moan about it instead and say that it’s way too long. Why is the film almost 3 hours long? I’d had enough after about 90 minutes. The re-hashed storyline was okay – but far from brilliant. The battles had all been seen before. And before that. And before that. One thing I will praise highly is the way the film rewrites history and mixes some historical footage with the new stuff. I liked that. If the film hadn’t been sooooo long, I may have enjoyed it more. Josh Duhamel scores 10/10 just for being himself.

Bridesmaids (Starring Kristen Wiig, Chris O’Dowd & other unknowns….) - My rating 10/10 (still)….

Okay – this is the first film of 2011 that I went to watch twice! The second time around it was still VERY funny! I just laugh so much when watching it. I must download it once it’s on iTunes.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Part 2) (Starring Danielle Radcliffe, Emma Watson & Rupert Grint, etc) - My rating 11+/10.

Simply amazing! The ending was everything I had been waiting for. This film has possibly had the highest expectation of any film in recent times. The final part of one of the best stories ever written. (In my opinion it IS the best story ever written).  The films brings together the cast from films dating way back to the first film in 2001. I particularly loved the scenes where the main characters go back to places that we featured in the first couple of films. The Voldermort-vs-Potter parts are excellent. The hairs were standing on the back of my arms…. My eyes were glued to the screen….. Fingers in my mouth…… Nerves! I knew what was coming but all the same, I was excited. Brilliant brilliant brilliant. Potter fans will be pleased. No wonder this film is breaking all the records!

Bridesmaids (Starring Kristen Wiig, Chris O’Dowd & other unknowns….) - My rating 10/10.

Brilliant! This is possibly the funniest film that I have seen in the last three years! I really mean that. I loved it all and I laughed so hard that it hurt. The wedding dress shop scenes were hillarious. The cinema was in uproar when the scenes unfolded. Classic! I want to go and see this film again in the next week. It’s too good not watch again and again. Well done writers! You really hit the spot.

Bad Teacher (Starring Cameron Diaz, Justin Timberlake) - My rating 7/10.

Light-hearted and funny! I really enjoyed this cringe-worthy film. Perhaps I found it so funny because I’m also a teacher. I’d never do any of the things that Diaz did in this film, but…..there’s always the chance. Timberlake is so geeky. It’s actually quite amusing watching him. There are actually people like that in the world too. Oh dear. Well, the film is easy-to-watch. It won’t go down as a classic, but hey ho. Who needs a classic every time?

X-Men: First Class (Starring James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender) - My rating 5/10.

First Class this was not. Ok, I’m not a huge Marvel fan. I know, I know, you’re now asking why then I would watch X-Men. Well, it was entertaining. Corny but entertaining. Good effects, odd storyline and characters that I couldn’t relate to. I don’t have any of those special powers. Great for kids and comic fans.

The Hangover Part 2 (Starring Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, and Zach Galifianakis. Todd Phillips) - My rating 8.5/10.

I laughed and I laughed. This film was hillarious from beginning to end. The 2009 film was great and this did not disappoint. A film to make you cringe at the mere thought. Some great shockers! I am not sure that I will ever be visiting Bangkok. Let’s just say that the film did the city no favours. A must see for comedy fans.

Unknown (Starring Liam Neeson and Diane Kruger) - My rating 9.5/10.

What a superb film. Hooked from the beginning! The plot is brilliant and the action scenes had be on the edge of my seat. I had my hands to my face and felt as though I was there. This is one of the best films I’ve EVER seen. Top 3 for 2011 for sure. It is based on a 2003 French novel, translated into English: Out of My Head, by Didier van Cauwelaert. I may have to read that sometime soon. Go and see this film. You will LOVE it!

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 (in 3D) (Starring Johnny Depp, Jeoffrey Rush and Penélope Cruz) - My rating 7.5/10.

The fourth film in the series was not a disappointment. I wasn’t that impressed with the third installment (then again, I wasn’t looking forward to the 3D film either – I think it’s overrated). The film surprised me and was enjoyable to watch. It did go over the same old, same old…. There was nothing new here, but the effects were good.

Fast and Furious 5 (Starring Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster and Dwayne Johnson) - My rating 5/10.

The filming was good. The screenshots and action was pretty cool. The plot was stretching reality to the limit. I’m sorry, but two cars cannot physically drag a HUGE metal vault (full of cash, I might add) through the streets. I know, I know….it’s a film, but even so the plot had me shaking my head. The acting was poor. Johnson is awful and the parts with him-vs-Diesel are cringe-worthy. Too much testosterone and not enough acting school methinks.

Thor in 3D (Starring  Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins) - My rating 8.5/10.

All the ingredients that I was expecting. I was not let down by this film based of myths and legends. I was surprised that Thor was ever part of Marvel Comics (I had no idea). I knew about the hammer-weilding character from ancient stories. Chris Hemsworth was great in the lead role. I’d made my mind up on that even before the topless scene (honest). Great all-round entertainment. I can really sit back and relax with films like this.

The Next Three Days (Starring  Russell Crowe and Elizabeth Banks) - My rating 7/10.

Action and suspense. A gripping story about a mother who is convicted of murder and the lengths to which a husband will go to free her. Easy-to-watch and full of action once the plan takes shape. It’s shocking to think that this might happen in real life. Crowe plays a man on a mission and one so desperate to free his wife that he makes so many mistakes. It was edge of the seat viewing.

Source Code (Starring  Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle Monaghan, Vera Farmiga and Jeffrey Wright) – My rating 9.5/10.

The first film since Inception that stunned me with its amazing storyline. Brilliant from beginning to end. This film brought in elements that gripped me from the start. I loved how the film took a situation and repeated over and over to allow the viewer to work parts out for themselves. I suppose it also had similarities to the film Vantage Point. Vera Farmiga is a superb actress – very understated. I hope to see her in many more films. I worked out the whodunnit part. I was so pleased with myself.

Limitless (Starring Bradley Cooper and Robert De Niro) - My rating 6.5/10.

One tablet to turn your life around. Half of the time, watching this film, I felt as though I’d taken some odd tablet. The filming takes you on a journey through corporate life and how someone’s fortunes can change. What would life be like if you could use 100% of your brain. Well – now I know. A little exciting at times, gruesome in other parts….. Not bad. I’ve seen a lot better so far this year though. (Gosh – Look at me getting all critical).

The Mechanic (Starring Jason Statham) - My rating 6.5/10.

This thriller has many undertones from previous movies. James Bond comes toi mind when you watch this. It’s entertaining – nothing new. The storyline is somewhat predictable. I could have written it for them, but all in all it was ok. I like the ending. Is that a compliment? I don’t think I ‘connected with the characters’. Hey ho – It was good for my Thursday night free film.

I Am Number Four. (Starring Alex Pettyfer) - My rating 8/10.

I’m not a big Sci-Fi fan, but this one ticked all the right boxes for me. A great film with a gripping plot. I jumped out of my seat a couple of times (one serious jump almost had me over the back of the seat). Pettyfer, a Brit, played the role of Number Four really well – Good to look at too. It’s all about nine aliens hiding on Earth. They are being hunted by the Mogadorians, who destroyed their home planet (and they’re ugly things). Number Four, moves from place to place with his ‘protector’ and tries (not very well) to keep a low-profile. Add the ‘ah-factor’ to the film, a bit of action and it’s all round good entertainment. Apparently, the sequel is due out in the summer of 2011.

Hereafter. (Starring Matt Damon and Cécile de France) - My rating 5/10.

Two words sprang to mind after watching this film. Long and depressing. I’d seen the trailer for the film months ago and forgot what the main plot was – so had an awful shock when I sat watching the tsunami scene at the beginning (a bit too close to reality being the day after I’d watched news of the tsunami in Japan). The film had moments to shock and looked at the afterlife. All in all though, the 129 minutes seemed to drag on and on without real substance. The storyline involving 11-year old twins is devestating and the link to the London bombings of 2005 had me jumping in my seat. Uncomfortable viewing and not well executed.

No Strings Attached. (Starring Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher) - My rating 8/10.

I know – I know – I’ve scored it really quite well. It’s typical, clichéd rom-com stuff that has been done a thousand times before. But. There’s always a but. The ingredients work and this film works. The relationship between Portman and Kutcher is great. The film is believable. If you watch it and don’t think it could happen, well then, I think you’ve led a sheltered life. Haha. I laughed – I cried (only a little, but still the musical arrangement did its magic). I left the cinema feelings all warm and guey. Doesn’t that make you sick?

True Grit. (Starring Jeff Bridges and Matt Damon) - My rating 7/10.

Although Bridges and Damon are the ‘big names’ making the headline on the posters and bringing in the crowds, this film is made truly wonderful by the actress Hailee Steinfeld as the character Mattie Ross. True Grit is a story of revenge. The humour is brilliant! I laughed out loud so many times. Ross is a feisty character who knows her own mind (at 14 years of age) and will not stand for anyone treating her like a child. The relationship between Ross and U.S. Marshal Reuben J. “Rooster” Cogburn is heartwarming. I’m not a big fan of ‘Westerns’, but this one was a refreshing change. There are so many brilliant lines in this film…. Go see it!

127 hours. (Starring James Franco) - My rating 8/10.

This is wonderful. The opening sequence of the film is amazing. I love the split screen idea and the artwork. I was hooked straight away. James Franco plays Aron Ralston really well. The film is based on a true story about Ralston, a real-life mountain climber, who in 2003 finds himself trapped in the middle Utah. I watched parts of the film through my fingers (namely, the bit when he breaks his own arm and then cuts it off). It is emotional, graphic and psychologically traumatic. I cannot imagine what it must have been like to be trapped by a boulder. The film depicts the emotions so well. This film will give ‘The King’s Speech’ a run for its money in the Academy Awards. It’s also amazing to note that the family (the first to meet him after his escape) were from Voorburg, The Netherlands (which is about 5 minutes from where I live). More about the film on Wikipedia here.

The King’s Speech. (Starring Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush and Helena Bonham-Carter) - My rating 10/10.

An amazing film. This is a ‘must-see’. I was shocked and surprised by the film as it showed how little I knew about some aspects of history. There are moments that you can almost feel what it was like to be watching and listening to ‘Bertie’ giving a speech. The story is heart-warming and refreshing. By the end of the film the hairs on my arms were tingling. Award winning all the way!!! I blogged a little more about this film.

Season of the Witch. (Starring Nicholas Cage) - My rating 6/10.

The film promised so much more than it delivered. The start to the film was good, a real build up to the problems and suspicions of having a witch in the village. As the journey began there were some moments that I had to hide. (OK, I’m not the best one for handling ‘jumpy’ moments. This film had a few cliché moments that had been seen many times before. The ending was a bit too predictable. Hey ho. Light entertainment. 

The Dilemma. (Starring Vince Vaughn and Kevin James) - My rating 4/10.

Oh, oh, oh. What a cringe-worthy film. I actually watched parts of this ‘comedy’ through my fingers. The film is based around two guys (best friends) who are partners in a car design firm. They’ve been best friends since their college years and then one day one of them sees the other’s girlfriend kissing another man. Should he say? Should he not? The dilemma begins…… The film includes possibly one of the most irritating scenes where one character has something crucial to say, yet is interrupted time after time. (That would never happen in real life!!). I left feeling suitably frustrated. The funny parts of the film were soon forgotten. Not worth watching until it makes it to TV in a few years time….. Even then I’d only watch it by accident.

The Tourist. (Starring Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp) - My rating 9/10.

I have to be honest and say that I never really rated Jolie as an actress, but since watching Salt and now this I may be a converted Jolie-fan. This film is fantastic! It has a great pace and I have to admit that I was hooked from the beginning. Again we return to Venice (It seems to have become the film-set for all action movies in recent years). The film centres around Jolie’s character being followed (not very subtly) and a series of traps being set. Who’s good and who’s bad? It’s one to work out. I don’t want my blog to be a spoiler but this is one film that is worth going to see. More about the film on Wikipedia, here.

Love and Other Drugs. (Starring Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway) - My rating 7/10.

I went to the cinema expecting this to be an easy comedy-romance. It was actually pretty good. I was surprised by the twist in the storyline. The film touches on issues surrounding Parkinson’s disease and it’s done incredibly well. This is a film to make you think. I left it feeling quite warm inside. More about the film on Wikipedia, here.